If you like this site, please consider disabling adblock to support the servers. Premium users do not see ads.
Marshazzle
1/32
Scout
(261 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(261 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
Soldier
(263 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(263 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
Pyro
(257 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(257 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
Demoman
(243 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(243 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
Heavy
(245 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(245 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
Engineer
(226 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(226 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
Medic
(235 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(235 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
Sniper
(230 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(230 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
Spy
(233 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
(233 ITEMS IN INVENTORY)
>> Weapons
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
2
3
3
2
1
1
1
2
2
2
1
1
3
3
3
1
3
1
3
1
3
2
2
1
1
1
1
1
2
2
1
1
1
1
0
2
2
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
2
2
2
1
2
1
2
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
2
1
1
1
2
2
1
2
2
1
1
1
2
2
2
2
1
3
3
2
3
2
3
3
1
2
2
2
1
2
2
2
2
3
2
0
2
2
1
1
1
2
1
1
2
1
2
2
1
1
2
2
4
1
3
4
3
2
3
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
2
2
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
0
1
2
1
2
1
1
2
1
1
0
0
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
1
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
2
1
2
1
1
2
1
1
1
0
>> Hats
1
0
1
1
1
0
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
2
2
1
1
1
1
0
1
2
1
2
0
1
1
0
1
1
1
10
0
1
0
1
0
1
3
2
1
1
1
2
3
1
2
1
2
1
1
1
0
2
0
1
1
1
0
1
1
1
1
1
0
1
1
1
2
1
1
0
1
2
1
1
1
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
4
2
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
2
0
1
1
1
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
2
2
1
1
1
1
2
1
2
1
2
1
0
1
1
1
1
1
2
2
1
1
1
2
1
1
2
1
0
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
2
2
2
1
1
2
0
1
1
1
2
1
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
2
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
0
0
1
1
0
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
0
1
1
1
0
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
2
2
2
1
1
2
1
2
3
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
2
1
2
0
1
0
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
2
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
1
1
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
2
1
1
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
0
1
0
0
0
1
1
0
0
1
0
1
0
1
0
0
0
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
0
0
1
0
2
0
1
1
1
1
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
0
0
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
0
0
1
1
0
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
>> Crafting
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
2
4
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
>> Tools
1
1
37
25
25
25
25
25
25
25
0
0
25
1
25
0
25
25
0
1
25
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
10
7
0
6
2
1
0
0
0
1
2
1
1
2
11
0
2
0
0
0
6
0
0
1
19
1
1
0
3
1
0
1
0
0
0
0
1
0
0
0
0
2
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
3
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
1
0
1
1
3
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
>> Mann Co. Supply Crate
#1
0
#2
0
#3
0
#4
0
#5
0
#6
0
#7
0
#8
0
#9
0
#10
0
#11
0
#12
0
#13
0
#14
0
#15
0
#16
0
#17
0
#18
0
#19
0
#20
0
#21
0
#22
0
#23
0
#24
0
#25
0
#26
0
#27
0
#28
0
#29
0
#30
1
#31
0
#32
0
#33
0
#34
0
#35
0
#36
0
#37
0
#38
0
#39
0
#40
0
#41
0
#42
0
#43
0
#44
0
#45
0
#46
0
#47
0
#48
0
#49
0
#50
0
#51
0
#52
0
#53
0
#54
0
#55
0
#56
0
#57
0
#58
0
>> Misc
2
3
0
1
0
1
0
1
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
8
1
1
1
1
1
2
2
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
5
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
1
1
0
0
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
4
2
0
0
0
1
0
1
2
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
Scout Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Whoopee Cap
Level 44 Hat
You'd have to be a jughead not to realize this cap is the pinnacle of
fashion for the discerning youth.
Vintage Ye Olde Baker Boy
Level 48 Hat
Extra! Extra! You're frickin' dead!
Troublemaker's Tossle Cap
Level 12 Hat
Straight outta control point.
The Hermes
Level 10 Hat
Don't shoot the messenger. Actually, go ahead and try. Can't be done,
pal! Too fast!
The Backwards Ballcap
Level 10 Hat
Stick it to Major League Baseball by not wearing their hat the right
way.
The Hero's Tail #524
Level 60 Hat
Possibly the result of pigmentation loss due to horrible experiments.
Possibly a mop of some kind.
Flipped Trilby
Level 81 Hat
The El Jefe #3690
Level 10 Hat
The Milkman
Level 69 Hat
The Hot Dogger #2666
Level 10 Hat
There's been a terrible explosion at the hot dog factory! That's what
you can tell people, and they'll believe you because you will look
like an expert on hot dogs.
The Big Elfin Deal
Level 95 Hat
You ask me if I wanna be a dentist one more time, pal, I'm gonna kick
your teeth in.
The Superfan
Level 10 Hat
Bombing Run
Level 42 Hat
Death from above!
The Fed-Fightin' Fedora
Level 39 Hat
This hat commemorates that time you stuck it on a broom and tricked
the Feds into shooting at it for an hour while you scooted off with
all that bank money. Goes great with all those bullet wounds in your
torso from that time you pulled the same trick on much smarter Feds.
The Void Monk Hair
Level 1 Hat
Channel all the elegance and mystique of an elf with only half the
pretention with the Void Monk Hair. Also included with purchase:
effeminate good looks. But you already had those, didn't you, you
handsome devil.
The Robot Running Man
Level 80 Hat
You'd think this robot cap would slow Scout down, but he's actually
just as fast! It's all that milk he drinks. You didn't expect this
item to be a thinly veiled milk advertisement, did you? We're full of
surprises today. Just wait until you try to go to sleep tonight! Ohhh
boy!
The Stereoscopic Shades #143
Level 20 Glasses
If you close an eye, one of the teams will disappear. So don't do
that.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Spooky Sleeves
Level 31 Apparel
Get these now, before Glenn Danzig finds out about them and buys them
all! Seriously, you can have a world where these spooky sleeves are in
stock, or a world where Glenn Danzig exists, but not both! Hurry! He's
googling "spooky sleeves" RIGHT NOW!
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Fast Learner
Level 55 Shirt
Read a book – or at least look like you can – with this vintage
educational ensemble. Be the B.M.O.C. (Big Mouth on Campus) of your
own make-believe Ivy League!
The Boston Boom-Bringer
Level 76 Futuristic Sound Device
Walkin' down the street to the hardcore beat while his Mann Co. boom
vibrates the concrete.
taunt success sound (1)
The Boston Boom-Bringer
Level 75 Futuristic Sound Device
Walkin' down the street to the hardcore beat while his Mann Co. boom
vibrates the concrete.
taunt success sound (1)
The Planeswalker Goggles #68
Level 35 Hat
No more bugs in your eyes as you blaze across the map.
Bonk Boy #8800
Level 51 Hat
Sign of the Wolf's School #6453
Level 20 Medallion
One wolf, no moon. Collect all three!
The Bootie Time
Level 10 Apparel
You dasher! You dancer! You prancer! You VIXEN! Pull Santa's sleigh
all by yourself, you sexy little man.
Jingle all the way
Dillinger's Duffel
Level 98 Backpack
This duffel comes with leather straps so all your money doesn't fall
out. The leather straps also don't tighten all the way, so some money
WILL fall out, and ladies will know how rich you are. (Answer: Very.
Also handsome.)
The Track Terrorizer
Level 100 Shirt
For a brief stint in high school, Scout joined the track team in one
of his many schemes to pick up girls. He was kicked off the team after
three days when everyone realized he was 23-years-old and also not
enrolled in the school.
Three-Rune Blade
Level 10 Sword
On Hit: Bleed for 5 seconds
On Miss: Hit yourself. Idiot.
The Festive Holy Mackerel
Level 42 Fish
Getting hit by a fish has got to be humiliating.
Baby Face's Blaster
Level 10 Scattergun
40% more accurate
On Hit: Builds Boost
Run at up to double speed at maximum Boost
-30% damage penalty
35% slower move speed on wearer
Boost resets on jump
Festive Scattergun
Level 1 Scattergun
The Soda Popper
Level 10 Scattergun
Builds Hype as you run. When the Hype Meter is full, unleash
mini-crits!
25% faster reload time
+50% faster firing speed
-66% clip size
No random critical hits
The Shortstop
Level 1 Peppergun
Mann Co.'s latest in high attitude
break-action personal defense.
The Vintage Force-A-Nature
Level 75 Scattergun
Knockback on the target and shooter
+50% faster firing speed
+20% bullets per shot
-10% damage penalty
-66% clip size
Pretty Boy's Pocket Pistol
Level 10 Pistol
+15 max health on wearer
Wearer never takes falling damage
-25% slower firing speed
50% fire damage vulnerability on wearer
The Winger
Level 15 Pistol
+15% damage bonus
-60% clip size
Mad Milk
Level 5 Non-Milk Substance
Players heal 60% of the damage done
to an enemy covered with milk.
Vintage Crit-a-Cola
Level 5 Lunch Box
While under the effects, +25% movement speed and damage done and
damage taken will be mini-crits.
Vintage Bonk! Atomic Punch
Level 65 Lunch Box
The Flying Guillotine
Level 72 Cleaver
Throw at your enemies to make them bleed!
Long distance hits cause mini-crits
100% critical hit vs stunned players
No random critical hits
The Wrap Assassin
Level 15 Bat
These lovely festive ornaments are so beautifully crafted, your
enemies are going to want to see them close up. Indulge them by
batting those fragile glass bulbs into their eyes at 90 mph.
Alt-Fire: Launches a festive ornament that shatters causing bleed
-70% damage penalty
Unarmed Combat #5026
Level 27
So nice of the Spy to lend an arm...
The Atomizer
Level 10 Bat
Grants Triple Jump: The third jump deals 10 damage when used
-30% slower firing speed
-20% damage vs players
The Boston Basher
Level 25 Bat
On Hit: Bleed for 5 seconds
On Miss: Hit yourself. Idiot.
The Candy Cane
Level 25 Bat
On Kill: A small health pack is dropped
25% explosive damage vulnerability on wearer
The Fan O'War
Level 5 Gunbai
Winds of Gravel Pit
Scout brings on his fan!
You are marked for death
On Hit: One target at a time is marked for death, causing all damage taken to be mini-crits
-90% damage penalty
The Vintage Sun-on-a-Stick
Level 10 RIFT Fire Mace
Spiky end goes into other man.
100% critical hit vs burning players
-25% damage penalty
The Holy Mackerel
Level 42 Fish
Getting hit by a fish has got to be humiliating.
The Vintage Sandman
Level 53 Bat
Alt-Fire: Launches a ball that stuns opponents
-15 max health on wearer
Soldier Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Soldier's Stash
Level 63 Hat
This hat does not in any way, shape, or form, promote smoking or
gambling.
Vintage Killer's Kabuto
Level 77 Hat
A Haiku for war.
To defeat one's enemies.
Honor the crocket.
Vintage Tyrant's Helm
Level 97 Hat
I kicked your ass so hard it went back in time and got me this VIKING
HAT.
Vintage Stainless Pot
Level 18 Hat
Protects cranium from bullets and shrapnel.
Also heats soup.
Honcho's Headgear
Level 77 Hat
This hat has mean written all over it.
(Note from Legal: This hat has nothing written on it.)
Crafted by Marshazzle
Exquisite Rack
Level 60 Hat
Crafted by Marshazzle
Dr's Dapper Topper
Level 32 Hat
Crafted by Marshazzle
Honcho's Headgear
Level 35 Hat
This hat has mean written all over it.
(Note from Legal: This hat has nothing written on it.)
Jumper's Jeepcap
Level 43 Hat
Armored Authority #6987
Level 67 Hat
Furious Fukaamigasa #9008
Level 3 Hat
You can't tell, but he's furious.
The Lucky Shot
Level 75 Hat
Let's see you do that again, Private.
Sergeant's Drill Hat
Level 92 Hat
This hat is a handy replacement for profanity-filled ranting when you
don't feel like shouting yourself hoarse.
Stout Shako
Level 40 Hat
The grand achievement of
Victorian military fashion.
Lord Cockswain's Pith Helmet #9646
Level 69 Hat
Defiant Spartan
Level 42 Hat
Lumbricus Lid
Level 62 Hat
The Hat With No Name
Level 10 Hat
A nameless hat for a nameless man.
The Salty Dog
Level 10 Hat
Get all of a boat captain's respect without the crushing
responsibility of actually captaining a boat or the enormous amount of
ongoing maintenance a boat requires!
The Infernal Impaler #3717
Level 13 Hat
The Helmet Without a Home
Level 12 Hat
Think of this helmet as a fortified, portable home for your head. It's
also lined with tin foil, so nobody will be able to steal your
valuable tramp-thoughts.
The Conquistador
Level 86 Hat
Make Spanish history come alive with this authentic conquistador's
helmet, excavated from the actual grave of a sixteenth century French
cosplayer.
Soldier's Slope Scopers
Level 23 Hat
These extreme pro ski goggles let folks know there're be no bunny
slopes for this guy. Not with YOUR middling-to-average ski skills. No,
YOU'LL be skiing on all the intermediate slopes you can find, thank
you very much—hunting out those tasty gradual inclines.
Lord Cockswain's Novelty Mutton Chops and Pipe #61
Level 79 Facial Hair
Effect: Genteel Smoke
Fancy Dress Uniform #8827
Level 46 Uniform
The Kringle Collection
Level 61 Coat
Do the snow-pants dance with this stylish holiday ensemble from famed
Arctic designer Kristoff Kringle.
"Jingle Balls"
Level 20 Decorative Bombs
Just a like the Soldier's actual grenades, these shiny glass baubles
are purely ornamental.
The Captain's Cocktails
Level 36 Decorative Bombs
Attention, tramps! Are you MAN enough to carry around cans full of
expired soup? Are you CRAZY enough to pretend they're grenades? Are
you HUNGRY enough to probably eat the soup later, when nobody's
looking? We bet yes!
The Festive Buff Banner
Level 5 Battle Banner
Provides an offensive buff that causes
nearby team members to do mini-crits.
The Beggar's Bazooka
Level 92 Rocket Launcher
Hold Fire to load up to three rockets
Release Fire to unleash the barrage
Overloading the chamber will cause a misfire
+3 degrees random projectile deviation
Cannot collect ammo from dispensers
Festive Rocket Launcher
Level 1 Rocket Launcher
The Original
Level 5 Rocket Launcher
The Cow Mangler 5000
Level 30 Focused Wave Projector
Does not require ammo
Alt-Fire: A charged shot that mini-crits
players and disables buildings for 4 sec
No random critical hits
Deals only 20% damage to buildings
-10% damage penalty
Cannot be crit boosted
5% slower reload time
The Liberty Launcher
Level 25 Rocket Launcher
+40% projectile speed
-25% clip size
The Rocket Jumper
Level 1 Rocket Launcher
A special no-damage rocket launcher for learning
rocket jump tricks and patterns.
No self inflicted blast damage taken
+200% max primary ammo on wearer
-100% damage penalty
No random critical hits
Wearer cannot carry the intelligence briefcase
The Black Box
Level 5 Rocket Launcher
On Hit: +15 health
-25% clip size
The Vintage Direct Hit
Level 1 Rocket Launcher
+80% projectile speed
+25% damage bonus
Mini-crits targets launched airborne by explosions
-70% explosion radius
The Reserve Shooter
Level 10 Shotgun
Mini-crits airborne targets for 3 seconds after being deployed
15% faster weapon switch
-50% clip size
The Righteous Bison
Level 30 Indivisible Particle Smasher
Does not require ammo
Projectile penetrates enemy targets
Projectile cannot be deflected
Deals only 20% damage to buildings
The Mantreads
Level 10 Boots
-75% reduction in push force taken from damage
Deals 3x falling damage to the player you land on
The Vintage Escape Plan
Level 10 Pickaxe
Move speed increases as the user becomes injured
Blocks healing while in use
The Concheror
Level 5 Sashimono
With buff, some damage
Dished out by nearby teammates
Comes back as healing
The Battalion's Backup
Level 10 Battle Banner
Provides a defensive buff that protects
nearby team members from crits
and blocks 35% of incoming damage.
Rage increases through damage taken.
The Vintage Buff Banner
Level 5 Battle Banner
Provides an offensive buff that causes
nearby team members to do mini-crits.
The Vintage Gunboats
Level 10 Boots
-60% blast damage from rocket jumps
The Market Gardener
Level 10 Shovel
Deals crits while the wielder is rocket jumping
No random critical hits
The Disciplinary Action
Level 10 Riding Crop
On Hit Ally: Boosts both players' speed for several seconds
-25% damage penalty
The Vintage Pain Train
Level 5 Makeshift Club
+1 capture rate on wearer
10% bullet damage vulnerability on wearer
The Vintage Equalizer
Level 10 Pickaxe
Damage increases as the user becomes injured
Blocks healing while in use
Pyro Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Triboniophorus Tyrannus
Level 76 Hat
At least he's still telling you to burn things.
Vintage Brigade Helm
Level 75 Hat
Vintage Respectless Rubber Glove
Level 13 Hat
It doesn't matter how much people respect you when they're on fire.
Vintage Pyro's Beanie
Level 66 Hat
Vintage Whiskered Gentleman
Level 15 Facial Hair
The most distinguished tape-on fire-retardant facial hair available,
for the discerning gentleman of conflagration.
Vintage Foster's Facade
Level 1 Hat
Vintage Stockbroker's Scarf
Level 1 Hat
Hottie's Hoodie #7934
Level 17 Hat
If you've got it, flaunt it.
If you don't, hide it under this discreet hoodie.
Crafted by Marshazzle
Handyman's Handle
Level 16 Hat
Clears all sorts of blockage.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Little Buddy #4288
Level 10 Hat
People will think you're in the Navy. But the joke is on them, BECAUSE
YOU'RE NOT! That is just one possible benefit of this tricky hat.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Bubble Pipe #3294
Level 4 Hat
Being an invention that achieves the humanitarian goal of all great
men of science, from Lord Holland to the Duke of Wellington, to allow
a true gentle-man to smoke a pipe in space.
Effect: Genteel Smoke
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Flamboyant Flamenco #134
Level 10 Hat
Help your enemies celebrate Day of the Dead by wearing this hat and
then killing them.
Crafted by Marshazzle
Napper's Respite
Level 9 Hat
After a long day of burning scouts.
Connoisseur's Cap #165
Level 69 Hat
You're today's theme ingredient...
Pyromancer's Mask
Level 80 Hat
Vintage Merryweather
Level 79 Hat
Pyro wears this in tribute to the many firefighters who have perished
trying to quell his flames.
The Cremator's Conscience #2990
Level 15 Conscience
'Burn him with fire!' 'No, burn him with fire, then hit him with an
axe!'
Old Guadalajara
Level 59 Hat
This hat adds spice to any occasion.
Madame Dixie
Level 92 Hat
The Attendant
Level 18 Hat
The Birdcage #945
Level 10 Hat
Everyone will wonder what the secret meaning of this mysterious hat
is. The secret is you're an idiot.
Triboniophorus Tyrannus
Level 43 Hat
At least he's still telling you to burn things.
The Triclops
Level 10 Hat
Fool your enemies into thinking you can see better! Here's the trick:
You won't be able to see at all!
( Not Tradable )
The Last Breath #3146
Level 13 Hat
Apparition's Aspect #3039
Level 13 Hat
Sight for Sore Eyes
Level 50 Hat
Humorously vellicating vitreous.
The HazMat Headcase
Level 64 Hat
This impermeable, gas-tight hood keeps your head at a comfortable
350-degree temperature throughout the day. The tinted visor lets you
sweat off that unsightly face fat in the privacy of your own
sweltering hell.
The Winter Wonderland Wrap
Level 18 Mask
Just because you're an unknowable enigma doesn't mean you shouldn't
bundle up. Remember what your mom told you... if you even HAVE one,
you inscrutable person of mystery!
The Moonman Backpack #4440
Level 15 Fuel Tank
Being a repository of the foundational ingredients necessary for a
body to live a life of leisure in space—namely one part oxygen, one
part mercury, and twelve parts laudanum.
The Rainblower
Level 10 Flame Thrower
Your friends (enemies) will squeal with delight (be consumed with
fire) when you cover them in sparkly rainbows (all-consuming fire).
(Equips Pyrovision.)
vision opt in flags (1)
On Equip: Visit Pyroland
Only visible in Pyroland
Festive Flame Thrower
Level 1 Flame Thrower
The Phlogistinator
Level 2 Flame Thrower
Being a revolutionary appliance capable of awakening the fire element
phlogiston that exists in all combustible creatures, which is to say,
all of them.
All fire damage charges 'Mmmph', activate to refill health and crit for several seconds
-10% damage penalty
No airblast
No random critical hits
The Degreaser
Level 10 Flame Thrower
65% faster weapon switch
-25% afterburn damage penalty
-10% damage penalty
The Vintage Backburner
Level 74 Flame Thrower
100% critical hits from behind
+150% airblast cost
The Scorch Shot
Level 10 Flare Gun
Flare knocks back target on hit
and ignites enemies in a small radius
-50% damage penalty
The Manmelter #27835
Level 30 Indivisible Particle Smasher
Being a device that flouts conventional scientific consensus that the
molecules composing the human body must be arranged "just so", and
not, for example, across a square-mile radius.
Does not require ammo
+50% projectile speed
Alt-Fire: Extinguish teammates to gain guaranteed critical hits
No random critical hits
The Reserve Shooter
Level 10 Shotgun
Mini-crits airborne targets for 3 seconds after being deployed
15% faster weapon switch
-50% clip size
Detonator
Level 10 Flare Gun
Alt-Fire: Detonate flare.
+25% damage to self
The Jingle Belt
Level 9 Bells
Slay-bells will be ringing in the slow-roasted ears of your burn
victims.
Jingle all the way
The Vintage Flare Gun
Level 35 Flare Gun
The Lollichop
Level 45 Fire Axe
Fill (split) your buddies' tummies (skulls) with delicious candy (cold
steel) with this oversized sugary treat. (Equips Pyrovision.)
vision opt in flags (1)
On Equip: Visit Pyroland
Only visible in Pyroland
The Third Degree
Level 10 Fire Axe
Being a boon to tree-fellers, backwoodsmen and atom-splitters the
world over, this miraculous matter-hewing device burns each individual
molecule as it cleaves it.
All players connected via Medigun beams are hit
The Postal Pummeler
Level 10 Mailbox
100% critical hit vs burning players
-50% damage vs non-burning players
No critical hits vs non-burning players
The Maul
Level 5 Sledgehammer
Packs a devastating punch with a hint of Mars dust.
100% damage vs buildings
Damage removes Sappers
-25% damage vs players
Vintage Sharpened Volcano Fragment
Level 10 RIFT Fire Axe
Improves upon Mother Nature's original
design for volcanos by increasing portability.
Modern science is unable to explain exactly
where the lava is coming from.
On Hit: target is engulfed in flames
-20% damage penalty
The Back Scratcher
Level 10 Garden Rake
+25% damage bonus
+50% health from packs on wearer
-75% health from healers on wearer
The Powerjack
Level 5 Sledgehammer
+75 health restored on kill
+20% damage from melee sources while active
The Vintage Homewrecker
Level 5 Sledgehammer
100% damage vs buildings
Damage removes Sappers
-25% damage vs players
The Vintage Axtinguisher
Level 78 Fire Axe
100% critical hit vs burning players
-50% damage vs non-burning players
No critical hits vs non-burning players
Demoman Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Hustler's Hallmark
Level 26 Hat
Vintage Glengarry Bonnet
Level 18 Hat
Vintage Scotsman's Stove Pipe
Level 51 Hat
Vintage Demoman's Fro
Level 61 Hat
The Samur-Eye
Level 55 Hat
One-eyed Scottish drunk
Dons his helmet for battle
Blacks out, misses war
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Buccaneer's Bicorne #4702
Level 10 Hat
Hoist the mainsail! Buckle those swashes! Get into a swordfight!
Pirate captains yell stuff like this all the time, and now you can
too.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Tavish DeGroot Experience #8857
Level 10 Hat
Hey, Joe, where you going with that sticky launcher in your hand?
Crafted by Marshazzle
Prince Tavish's Crown
Level 68 Hat
Rimmed Raincatcher
Level 58 Hat
Because there's no alliteration
like alliteration with an 'ARR!'
Tam O' Shanter
Level 43 Hat
A Whiff of the Old Brimstone
Level 20 Decorative Bombs
Your enemies will clap in delight at the cartoonish innocence of these
old-timey bombs, making it that much sweeter when you blow their arms
off.
Reggaelator
Level 33 Hat
Every little thing is gonna be alright.
Sultan's Ceremonial #2174
Level 99 Hat
The Bolgan
Level 91 Hat
Protect the all-important empty socket part of your face while giving
enemies an irresistible target: unimportant exposed parts like your
mouth, nose and generally all the non-socket parts of your face.
The Grenadier Helm
Level 1 Hat
Argghhh! You're angry! And you're small! And you need to convey these
facts through a single accessory! Strap on the Grenadier Helm and send
your enemies to whatever level of Dwarfish hell you deem appropriate.
The Snapped Pupil
Level 83 Photograph
Be honest, lads. Ye cannae even tell, can ye?
The Liquor Locker #899
Level 94 Treasure
The Demo keeps his fortune close to his chest: Specifically, on the
other side of it, strapped to his back. You won't find money in it:
Demo wisely invests in gold, which he then spends on rare cask-aged
liquors, which he then usually drinks, which is why he keeps it locked
and the key hidden.
The Bird-Man of Aberdeen
Level 89
This shoulder-mounted feathered friend comes in any color you like,
and is so full of whiskey it couldn't fly off if it wanted to. Great
to have around if you decide to eat it—just turn your head and bite!
The Bird-Man of Aberdeen
Level 56
This shoulder-mounted feathered friend comes in any color you like,
and is so full of whiskey it couldn't fly off if it wanted to. Great
to have around if you decide to eat it—just turn your head and bite!
The Battery Bandolier
Level 99 Decorative Bombs
For the first time in history, batteries are included with your
purchase of Demo's battery Bandolier. Because, well, you're purchasing
batteries. We should have said, for the first time in history [except
for all those times you bought batteries].
Dangeresque, Too?
Level 20 Glasses
Splash the pot with all you got.
( Not Tradable )
The Head Warmer #104
Level 36 Hat
This incinerator's insulator keeps your head a perfect 105 degrees,
while muffling the hallucinations brought on by wearing a hat that
slowly cooks your brain.
The Waxy Wayfinder #6585
Level 50 Hat
Finally live your life like a candle in the wind. (Wind not included.)
Effect: Genteel Smoke
The Burning Bongos #1104
Level 84 Bongos
When you were a kid, all you wanted was to play the bongos. But then
you grew up and, like all of us, realized you're not as good at bongos
as Matthew McConaughey. Well, guess what, pal: Nobody is, or ever will
be. (Equips Pyrovision.)
vision opt in flags (1)
On Equip: Visit Pyroland
Only visible in Pyroland
The Infernal Orchestrina
Level 65 Backpack
Your BFFs (enemies) will turn their frowns upside down (confront their
own mortality) as they dance a merry jig to (run in terror from) these
cheery tunes (soul-destroying funeral dirges). (Equips Pyrovision.)
vision opt in flags (1)
On Equip: Visit Pyroland
taunt success sound (2)
Only visible in Pyroland
The Tribal Bones
Level 1 Bones
No ritual that results in the senseless destruction of human life at
the behest of an angry god is complete without a Tribal Bones
necklace. Like all of our mothers weirdly happened to say, if you're
going to do some human sacrifices, you gotta look the part.
The Pyrobotics Pack
Level 69 Backpack
Did you know that fire can melt metal? Like, say you were fighting an
army of robots. You could melt them! With fire! It's true! Just a fun
little fact we learned today. We don't really see any practical
application for the information, but it's good to learn.
The Neon Annihilator
Level 97 Sign
100% critical hit vs wet players
Damage removes Sappers
-20% damage vs players
No random critical hits
The Festive Axtinguisher
Level 10 Fire Axe
100% critical hit vs burning players
-50% damage vs non-burning players
No critical hits vs non-burning players
The Loose Cannon
Level 10 Grenade Launcher
override projectile type (17)
Cannonballs push players back on impact
Cannonballs have a fuse time of 2 seconds; fuses can be primed to explode earlier by holding down the fire key.
Cannonballs do not explode on impact
-50% damage on contact with surfaces
Festive Grenade Launcher
Level 1 Grenade Launcher
The Bootlegger
Level 10 Boots
Amaze your friends! Impress women! Walk with a limp for life! It's
grotesque!
+100% increase in turning control while charging
+25 max health on wearer
Ali Baba's Wee Booties
Level 10 Boots
+100% increase in turning control while charging
+25 max health on wearer
The Vintage Loch-n-Load
Level 10 Grenade Launcher
+20% damage bonus
+25% projectile speed
-50% clip size
+25% damage to self
Launched bombs shatter on surfaces
Festive Stickybomb Launcher
Level 1 Stickybomb Launcher
The Sticky Jumper
Level 1 Stickybomb Launcher
A special no-damage stickybomb launcher for learning stickybomb jump
tricks and patterns.
No self inflicted blast damage taken
+200% max secondary ammo on wearer
override projectile type (14)
-100% damage penalty
No random critical hits
Wearer cannot carry the intelligence briefcase
The Splendid Screen
Level 10 Shield
Can deal charge impact damage at any range
+70% increase in charge impact damage
+20% fire damage resistance on wearer
+15% explosive damage resistance on wearer
The Vintage Chargin' Targe
Level 10 Shield
Alt-Fire: Gain increased attack power by
charging toward your enemies.
+50% fire damage resistance on wearer
+40% explosive damage resistance on wearer
The Vintage Scottish Resistance
Level 5 Stickybomb Launcher
+25% faster firing speed
Detonates stickybombs near the crosshair and directly under your feet
Able to destroy enemy stickybombs
+50% max secondary ammo on wearer
+6 max pipebombs out
0.8 sec slower bomb arm time
The Scottish Handshake
Level 10 Bottle
Your enemies will think you're making peace, right up until the
terrifying moment that their hand is very seriously cut! Here's the
trick: It's a broken bottle!
The Persian Persuader
Level 10 Sword
+100% increase in charge recharge rate
All ammo collected becomes health
No random critical hits
Nessie's Nine Iron
Level 5 Golf Club
No random critical hits
-25 max health on wearer
The Vintage Ullapool Caber
Level 10 Stick Bomb
High-yield Scottish face removal.
A sober person would throw it...
No random critical hits
The Claidheamh Mòr
Level 5 Sword
0.5 sec increase in charge duration
No random critical hits
-15 max health on wearer
Unusual Horseless Headless Horsemann's Headtaker
Level 68 Axe
Cursed by dark spirits similar to
those that dwell within the Eyelander.
No random critical hits
-25 max health on wearer
Unusual Horseless Headless Horsemann's Headtaker
Level 35 Axe
Cursed by dark spirits similar to
those that dwell within the Eyelander.
No random critical hits
-25 max health on wearer
Gift from: colesims99
The Vintage Scotsman's Skullcutter
Level 5 Axe
+20% damage bonus
15% slower move speed on wearer
The Vintage Eyelander
Level 5 Sword
This weapon has a large melee range.
Gives increased speed and health
with every head you take.
No random critical hits
-25 max health on wearer
The Vintage Half-Zatoichi
Level 5 Katana
Soldiers and Demos
Can duel with katanas
For a one-hit kill
On Kill: Restores you to 100% health
Honorbound: Once drawn cannot be sheathed until it kills.
Heavy Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Officer's Ushanka
Level 65 Hat
This hat was made of bear hands.
That bear was killed with bare hands.
Vintage Tough Guy's Toque
Level 49 Hat
Because when you're the toughest Mother Hubbard in the fort, nobody's
criticizing your fashion sense.
Vintage Football Helmet
Level 32 Hat
The Gym Rat #125
Level 10 Hat
Let's get physical. Physical.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Capo's Capper #8247
Level 6 Hat
This dashing number will help you commit crimes of all kinds—except
against fashion.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Big Chief
Level 49 Hat
Copper's Hard Top
Level 28 Hat
Hard Counter
Level 40 Hat
You can never be too careful
with Jarate around.
Pugilist's Protector
Level 79 Hat
Cadaver's Cranium
Level 31 Hat
The Dread Knot
Level 40 Hat
Crybabies cower
At the approach of fat man
With terrible hair
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Outdoorsman
Level 10 Hat
Chop wood. Eat syrup. Live in Canada. This hat lets you do it all.
The Gym Rat #4052
Level 10 Hat
Let's get physical. Physical.
The Hound Dog
Level 73 Hat
Your opponents will be all shook up when they see these sweet shades
and coif.
The Hound Dog
Level 30 Hat
Your opponents will be all shook up when they see these sweet shades
and coif.
The Dragonborn Helmet
Level 10 Hat
Designed to inspire fear, the dragons this helm was based on were less
than impressed.
Coupe D'isaster
Level 75 Hat
Dealer's Visor
Level 50 Hat
Do not try to bluff Sasha.
Pocket Medic #2695
Level 15 Pocket Buddy
Keep little healing man close.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The All-Father #128
Level 15 Facial Hair
Throughout the history of civilization, the white beard has come to
symbolize wisdom and status. Show the world it's possible to be
bearded AND stupid with this Heavy- and Soldier-specific face-nest.
Shove it, civilization!
The All-Father #2561
Level 15 Facial Hair
Throughout the history of civilization, the white beard has come to
symbolize wisdom and status. Show the world it's possible to be
bearded AND stupid with this Heavy- and Soldier-specific face-nest.
Shove it, civilization!
The Sandvich Safe
Level 15 Lunchbox
Keep sandvich safe with sandvich safe. Okay, is good, no more
description. Buy.
The Big Steel Jaw of Summer Fun
Level 73 Hat
Wee! It's summer! We're having fun!
AH GOD IT'S BOLTED TO HIS HEAD!
Large Luchadore #18590
Level 39 Hat
Wrestling's real, and now you can prove it.
Crafted by Marshazzle
Security Shades #15962
Level 89 Hat
Security Shades
Level 40 Hat
The Purity Fist
Level 10
The Toss-Proof Towel #681
Level 47 Apparel
Make sure you never throw in the towel, even accidentally, by keeping
it nice and close, where it can't run off and surrender like a coward
when you're not looking.
The Apparatchik's Apparel
Level 83 Shirt
Toting around a 150-kilogram minigun gives those forearm muscles a
nice workout. Show them off with these rolled-sleeved shirts, in your
choice of argyle, lumberjack, rugby stripe or vertical pinstripe.
The Huo-Long Heater
Level 72 Minigun
Sustains a ring of flames while deployed
6 ammo consumed per second while deployed
Festive Minigun
Level 1 Minigun
Tomislav
Level 5 Minigun
10% faster spin up time
Silent Killer: No barrel spin sound
-20% slower firing speed
The Vintage Brass Beast
Level 5 Minigun
+20% damage bonus
50% slower spin up time
-60% slower move speed while deployed
Vintage Natascha
Level 99 Minigun
On Hit: 100% chance to slow target
-25% damage penalty
30% slower spin up time
Iron Curtain
Level 5 Minigun
( Not Tradable )
The Festive Sandvich
Level 1 Lunch Box
The Family Business
Level 10 Shotgun
+33% clip size
-15% damage penalty
Fishcake
Level 1 Fishcake
Vossler Industries All-Natural Artificial-Fish-Derived Food Product
Adds +50 max health for 30 seconds
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Solemn Vow
Level 10 Bust of Hippocrates
'Do no harm.'
Allows you to see enemy health
The Vintage Buffalo Steak Sandvich
Level 1 Lunch Box
While under the effects, move speed is increased,
damage done and taken will be mini-crits,
and the player may only use melee weapons.
Who needs bread?
The Vintage Dalokohs Bar
Level 1 Lunch Box
Adds +50 max health for 30 seconds
The Vintage Sandvich
Level 32 Lunch Box
The Holiday Punch
Level 10 Fists
Be the life of the war party with these laugh-inducing punch-mittens.
Critical hit forces victim to laugh
Always critical hit from behind
On Hit: Force enemies to laugh who are also wearing this item
Critical hits do no damage
The Eviction Notice
Level 10 Boxing Gloves
+50% faster firing speed
-60% damage penalty
The Apoco-Fists
Level 10 Fists
Turn every one of your fingers into the Four Horsemen of the
Apocalypse! That's over nineteen Horsemen of the Apocalypse per glove!
The most Apocalypse we've ever dared attach to one hand!
Killing an enemy with a critical hit will dismember your victim. Painfully.
The Vintage Warrior's Spirit
Level 10 Boxing Gloves
+30% damage bonus
-20 max health on wearer
The Fists of Steel
Level 10 Boxing Gloves
-40% damage from ranged sources while active
+100% damage from melee sources while active
20% longer weapon switch
Gloves of Running Urgently
Level 10 Boxing Gloves
+30% faster move speed on wearer
You are marked for death while active, and for short period after switching weapons
When weapon is active:
-25% damage penalty
The Vintage Killing Gloves of Boxing
Level 99 Boxing Gloves
On Kill: 5 seconds of 100% critical chance
-20% slower firing speed
Engineer Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Safe'n'Sound
Level 8 Hat
It gets difficult trying to calculate the total external applied
torque to a body's rotational motion through its moment of momentum
vector while the distracting sounds of gunfire and death are all
around you. Build a better, safer machine with the silence of the
Safe'n'sound!
Vintage Engineer's Cap
Level 78 Hat
The Virtual Reality Headset #129
Level 10 Headset
With these on, you can pretend you're winning.
Crafted by Marshazzle
Ol' Geezer #4557
Level 30 Hat
Get off mah land!
Crafted by Marshazzle
Hotrod
Level 100 Hat
Mock the sun with streaks of flame as the UV rays bounce harmlessly
away from your eyeballs.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Brainiac Hairpiece #1661
Level 43 Facial Hair
Being a maths-enhancing hairpiece that endeavors to heighten the
senses of any soul, be he a gentle-man of leisure deserving of such a
thing, or a loathsome tiller of the earth of whom a beating would not
go unwarranted.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Itsy Bitsy Spyer #1940
Level 15 Pocket Buddy
Is that a miniature Spy in your pocket, or are you just happy to OH
GOD STOP HITTING ME!
Crafted by Marshazzle
Texas Ten Gallon
Level 10 Hat
Though it looks like a simple ten-gallon hat, this modern feat of
engineering actually contains more moving parts than a level 2 Sentry
Gun.
Buckaroos Hat
Level 12 Hat
Western Wear
Level 92 Hat
The old West never saw this kind of class.
Industrial Festivizer
Level 75 Hat
Big Country
Level 69 Hat
It'd be a damn shame to hide hair this handsome.
Big Country
Level 21 Hat
It'd be a damn shame to hide hair this handsome.
Texas Slim's Dome Shine
Level 33 Hat
Sometimes you just need a little less hat.
The Hetman's Headpiece
Level 58 Hat
Cossacks and war go together like gołąbki and wódka.
The Builder's Blueprints #3289
Level 15 Blueprints
Never bring a gun to a blueprint fight.
Prairie Heel Biters
Level 15 Spurs
Teddy Roosebelt
Level 4 Pocket Buddy
A cute, plushy pocket buddy.
Aw, he even has his own hat!
The Brainiac Goggles #2783
Level 20 Glasses
Being prescription shooting goggles that endeavor to relieve the eye
from the reflection off one's gun barrel whilst also correcting
Diplopia, Strabismus, 'Nervous Vision', Early-Onset Old-Eye, and
several other varieties of structural defect.
Googly Gazer
Level 77 Hat
Keep one eye on your enemy and
the other one on everything else.
The Stocking Stuffer #577
Level 92 Stocking
No need to hang this stocking over the mantle. It's already stuffed.
Thanks for nothing, Santa.
The Texas Half-Pants
Level 15 Apparel
It's pants... Texas Style! These crotchless leather leggings are
perfect if you already own pants. Note: To be used as auxiliary pants
only. Please do not employ as primary source of pants.
The Idea Tube
Level 83 Backpack
This handsome leather cylinder improves on the diary in every way. Do
you have secret thoughts? Write 'em down, ball 'em up, and stuff 'em
in the tube. It's incredibly easy to find a thought when you need it,
too. Simply empty out the tube and there they all are. You're just one
simple unballing away from remembering it.
The Pocket Purrer
Level 43 Satchel
Little known fact: cats are fantastic engineers. Go ahead and ask
about it next time you see one. In case you don't speak feline, "meow"
means "that cantilever is deflected over its g-type joist girder."
It's probably going to say that a lot.
The Scottish Resistance
Level 5 Stickybomb Launcher
+25% faster firing speed
Detonates stickybombs near the crosshair and directly under your feet
Able to destroy enemy stickybombs
+50% max secondary ammo on wearer
+6 max pipebombs out
0.8 sec slower bomb arm time
Mann Co. Supply Crate Key
Level 5 Tool
Used to open locked supply crates.
Mann Co. Supply Crate Key
Level 5 Tool
Used to open locked supply crates.
Mann Co. Supply Crate Key
Level 5 Tool
Used to open locked supply crates.
Mann Co. Supply Crate Key
Level 5 Tool
Used to open locked supply crates.
The Rescue Ranger
Level 28 Shotgun
Alt-Fire: Use metal to pick up buildings from long range
Fires a special bolt that can repair friendly buildings
override projectile type (18)
Self mark for death on building pick up
-50% max primary ammo on wearer
-34% clip size
Festive Frontier Justice
Level 5 Shotgun
When your sentry is destroyed you
gain revenge crits for every sentry kill
No random critical hits
-50% clip size
The Pomson 6000
Level 10 Indivisible Particle Smasher
Being an innovative hand-held irradiating utensil capable of producing
rapid pulses of high-amplitude radiation in sufficient quantity as to
immolate, maim and otherwise incapacitate the Irish.
Does not require ammo
Projectile cannot be deflected
On Hit: Victim loses 10% Medigun charge
On Hit: Victim loses 20% cloak
The Widowmaker
Level 5 Shotgun
No reload necessary
On Hit: damage dealt is returned as ammo
Per Shot: -30 ammo
Uses metal for ammo
Vintage Frontier Justice
Level 5 Shotgun
When your sentry is destroyed you
gain revenge crits for every sentry kill
No random critical hits
-50% clip size
The Short Circuit
Level 5 Robot Arm
On Fire: Generates an electrical field that destroys
projectiles and does slight damage to players
No reload necessary
Per Shot: -35 ammo
Uses metal for ammo
No random critical hits
The Diamondback
Level 5 Revolver
Gives one guaranteed critical hit for each
building destroyed with your sapper attached
-15% damage penalty
No random critical hits
Mann Co. Supply Crate Key
Level 5 Tool
Used to open locked supply crates.
Mann Co. Supply Crate Key
Level 5 Tool
Used to open locked supply crates.
Mann Co. Supply Crate Key
Level 5 Tool
Used to open locked supply crates.
The Vintage Wrangler
Level 5 Laser Pointer
Take manual control of your Sentry Gun
The Eureka Effect #1562
Level 20 Wrench
Being a tool that eliminates exertion by harnessing the electrical
discharges of thunder-storms for the vigorous coercion of bolts, nuts,
pipes and similar into their rightful places. May also be used to
bludgeon.
On Alt-Fire: Teleport to spawn
Cannot carry buildings
Festive Wrench
Level 1 Wrench
The Vintage Gunslinger
Level 15 Robot Arm
+25 max health on wearer
Replaces the Sentry with a fast building Mini-Sentry
No random critical hits
The Jag
Level 15 Wrench
30% faster construction rate
-25% damage penalty
The Vintage Southern Hospitality
Level 20 Wrench
On Hit: Bleed for 5 seconds
No random critical hits
20% fire damage vulnerability on wearer
The Original
Level 5 Rocket Launcher
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Medic Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Ze Goggles
Level 8 Glasses
Nothing
Vintage Otolaryngologist's Mirror
Level 60 Hat
We can't pronounce it either.
Vintage Vintage Tyrolean
Level 50 Hat
Vintage Physician's Procedure Mask
Level 93 Hat
Scrub in... things are about to get messy.
The Surgeon's Stahlhelm #4065
Level 10 Hat
Technically, field medics are protected as noncombatants under the
Geneva Convention. The next time you get shot be sure to tell your
killer. It's a conversation starter!
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Surgeon's Stahlhelm #4193
Level 10 Hat
Technically, field medics are protected as noncombatants under the
Geneva Convention. The next time you get shot be sure to tell your
killer. It's a conversation starter!
Crafted by Marshazzle
Medic's Mountain Cap
Level 94 Hat
The men in his unit called him 'The Bavarian Butcher'
Crafted by Marshazzle
Berliner's Bucket Helm
Level 88 Hat
Grimm Hatte
Level 91 Hat
Ye hae ne'er glympsed a hatte whych be
as grimm as yonder hatte ye glympse upon.
Vintage Tyrolean
Level 33 Hat
German Gonzila
Level 80 Hat
Doctor's Sack #3023
Level 43 Hat
For when you've got that healin' fever.
Gentleman's Gatsby
Level 22 Hat
While lacking the cachet of other hats, the Gatsby nonetheless
possesses its own sartorial elegance. Its understated and affable
charm appeals to everyone, whether playing a round of golf with
friends or performing non-elective surgery with a well-polished
bonesaw.
The Gentleman's Ushanka
Level 67 Hat
Made from genuine German rabbit fur, this military-grade trappers' hat
makes the perfect complement to the Officer's Ushanka. Let the officer
in your life know you'll always be right behind them, with a Medigun
at the ready and a matching wardrobe.
Physician's Procedure Mask
Level 12 Hat
Scrub in... things are about to get messy.
Physician's Procedure Mask
Level 14 Hat
Scrub in... things are about to get messy.
Couvre Corner #4858
Level 20 Pocket Square
Sometimes we put some jokes in these descriptions. But, no joke: This
looks good. Really sharp.
Pocket Medic
Level 15 Pocket Buddy
Keep little healing man close.
Blighted Beak
Level 73 Hat
The Surgeon's Stethoscope #1021
Level 20 Stethoscope
Look like you know what you're doing when you pronounce people dead.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Surgeon's Stethoscope
Level 20 Stethoscope
Look like you know what you're doing when you pronounce people dead.
The Nine-Pipe Problem #328
Level 94 Pipe
In the time it takes you to read this description, I've already ubered
a heavy, captured your base, solved a crime, and smoked three pipes.
Effect: Genteel Smoke
The Nine-Pipe Problem #11366
Level 65 Pipe
In the time it takes you to read this description, I've already ubered
a heavy, captured your base, solved a crime, and smoked three pipes.
Effect: Genteel Smoke
The Surgeon's Side Satchel #1204
Level 58 Satchel
This compact medical equipment bag makes the perfect accessory for the
doctor on the go. Treat patients out of doors, in the fresh unsterile
air of the battlefield.
The Medic Mech-bag
Level 78 Backpack
The best part of fighting a robot army is you get to salvage all of
their destroyed body parts for fun new accessories. Take the Medic
Mech-pack! What a fine looking number. It's a good thing robots don't
have souls, or they'd be mighty angry that we're using their body
parts as cosmetic items!
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
The Overdose
Level 5 Syringe Gun Prototype
Movement speed increases based on ÜberCharge percentage to a maximum
of +10%
-10% damage penalty
Vintage Crusader's Crossbow
Level 15 Crossbow
Fires special bolts that heal teammates and deal damage based on distance traveled
40% faster reload time
No headshots
-75% max primary ammo on wearer
The Vintage Blutsauger
Level 97 Syringe Gun
On Hit: +3 health
-2 health drained per second on wearer
The Vaccinator
Level 8 Vaccinator
ÜberCharge provides 75% resistance to a selected damage type. You are
healed for 25% of the matched incoming damage on your heal target.
+50% ÜberCharge rate
Special-Attack: Cycle through resist types.
While healing, provides you and your target with a constant 10% resistance to the selected damage type.
-66% Overheal build rate.
Festive Medi Gun
Level 1 Medi Gun
The Quick-Fix
Level 8 Medi Gun Prototype
Can't overheal.
Move at the speed of any faster heal target.
+40% heal rate
+25% ÜberCharge rate
ÜberCharge increases healing by 300% and grants immunity to movement-impairing effects
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
The Vintage Kritzkrieg
Level 93 Medi Gun
+25% ÜberCharge rate
ÜberCharge grants 100% critical chance
The Festive Ubersaw
Level 10 Bonesaw
On Hit: 25% ÜberCharge added
-20% slower firing speed
The Solemn Vow
Level 10 Bust of Hippocrates
'Do no harm.'
Allows you to see enemy health
The Vintage Amputator
Level 15 Bonesaw
On Taunt: Applies a healing effect to all nearby teammates
The Vita-Saw
Level 5 Bonesaw
On death up to 20% of your stored
ÜberCharge is retained
-10 max health on wearer
The Vintage Ubersaw
Level 79 Bonesaw
On Hit: 25% ÜberCharge added
-20% slower firing speed
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Australium Gold
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Sniper Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Master's Yellow Belt
Level 85 Hat
Only a master of Jarate earns the right to wear this once-white
bandanna, stained yellow from the rigors of a harsh training regimen.
Vintage Professional's Panama
Level 72 Hat
A polite, efficient hat to wear when killing everyone you meet.
Vintage Shooter's Sola Topi
Level 79 Hat
Perfect for exploring the outback and the inside of people's heads.
Crocleather Slouch
Level 70 Hat
Made from Australia's only natural resource.
Larrikin Robin
Level 69 Hat
Master's Yellow Belt
Level 82 Hat
Only a master of Jarate earns the right to wear this once-white
bandanna, stained yellow from the rigors of a harsh training regimen.
Trophy Belt
Level 10 Hat
Any old sap can pull teeth from a dead crocodile.
It takes a man to pull teeth from a live one.
Desert Marauder #3632
Level 54 Hat
Desert Marauder #12058
Level 3 Hat
Ol' Snaggletooth
Level 37 Hat
The Swagman's Swatter #109
Level 10 Hat
This is the best hat. We couldn't say it if it weren't true. This
one's the best.
Your Worst Nightmare
Level 10 Hat
This bandanna will teach you to eat things that would make a billy
goat puke. Like another billy goat.
The Fruit Shoot #1732
Level 23 Hat
This fun, all-ages activity brings history alive! All you need is a
bow, an arrow, an apple, and an idiot.
The Flamingo Kid
Level 10 Hat
Are you man enough to wear this brightly colored cowboy hat? Just in
case you're not, we slapped a half-a-skull on it to ease you into the
exciting new world of wearing this hat.
( Not Tradable )
Liquidator's Lid
Level 52 Hat
This wool cap/granny glasses combo fits any assassin, whether he's
saving orphans in heated gun battles with the mob or impersonating
lead guitarists in world-famous Irish rock bands.
The Outback Intellectual
Level 15 Apparel
Argyle. Pipe-smoking. Individually, they make you look like an idiot.
Together, they make you look smart AND stylish! Just like Umberto Eco!
Effect: Genteel Smoke
Villain's Veil #6563
Level 69 Hat
The good, the bad, and the dead.
The Crocodile Smile
Level 20 Necklace
How many crocodiles had to die to make this necklace? A lot. That's
the point.
The Crocodile Smile
Level 20 Necklace
How many crocodiles had to die to make this necklace? A lot. That's
the point.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
The Festive Huntsman
Level 10 Bow
override projectile type (19)
The Hitman's Heatmaker
Level 1 Sniper Rifle
Heads will roll.
Gain Focus on kills and assists
rage on assists (15)
Focus activates on Fire when Focus meter is full
In Focus: +25% faster charge and no unscoping
-20% damage on body shot
Festive Sniper Rifle
Level 1 Sniper Rifle
The Machina
Level 5 Sniper Rifle
On Full Charge: Projectiles penetrate players
On Full Charge: +15% damage per shot
Cannot fire unless zoomed
Fires tracer rounds
The Bazaar Bargain
Level 10 Sniper Rifle
Each scoped headshot decreases the weapon's charge time.
A scoped body shot or miss reduces the bonus.
Base charge rate decreased by 20%
The Sydney Sleeper
Level 1 Sniper Rifle
On Hit: Jarate applied to target for 8 seconds
+25% charge rate
No headshots
No random critical hits
The Vintage Huntsman
Level 10 Bow
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
The Cleaner's Carbine
Level 1 SMG
On Kill: 3 seconds of 100% critical chance
-35% slower firing speed
-20% clip size
No random critical hits
The Cozy Camper #2801
Level 10 Backpack
+1 health regenerated per second on wearer
Knockback reduced by 20% when aiming
No flinching when aiming
-80% slower move speed when aiming
Crafted by Marshazzle
Darwin's Danger Shield
Level 10 Shield
+25 max health on wearer
Vintage Jarate
Level 5 Jar Based Karate
Coated enemies take mini-crits
Also handy for putting out a fire
The Vintage Razorback
Level 90 Shield
Blocks a single backstab attempt
The Shahanshah
Level 5 Kukri
25% increase in damage when health <50% of max
-25% decrease in damage when health >50% of max
The Bushwacka
Level 5 Kukri
Crits whenever it would normally mini-crit
20% fire damage vulnerability on wearer
The Vintage Tribalman's Shiv
Level 5 Kukri
On Hit: Bleed for 6 seconds
-50% damage penalty
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Pink as Hell
Level 5 Tool
Used to paint other items.
Spy Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Backbiter's Billycock
Level 35 Hat
For when you wish your head was a little taller,
but just as round on top.
Vintage Fancy Fedora
Level 66 Hat
This smooth, suave, silk-lined beauty can turn any amateur backstabber
into a handsome rogue.
Vintage Camera Beard
Level 23 Facial Hair
You wouldn't mind if I read this top secret document with my beard,
would you?
Private Eye
Level 80 Hat
A select style for the scrutinizing sleuth.
Crafted by Marshazzle
Charmer's Chapeau
Level 33 Hat
It really is a chapeau. It's just in disguise.
Crafted by Marshazzle
Charmer's Chapeau
Level 91 Hat
It really is a chapeau. It's just in disguise.
Magistrate's Mullet
Level 21 Hat
They say justice is blind. What they don't tell you is that justice is
also invisible, and also less interested in justice than murder.
Détective Noir
Level 27 Hat
The Counterfeit Billycock #4250
Level 10 Hat
This hat is a spy.
Frenchman's Beret
Level 78 Hat
Because real espionage is an artform.
Frenchman's Beret
Level 60 Hat
Because real espionage is an artform.
Familiar Fez
Level 55 Hat
Backbiter's Billycock
Level 55 Hat
For when you wish your head was a little taller,
but just as round on top.
Cosa Nostra Cap
Level 15 Hat
If looks could kill, this dapper fellow would make your head an
accomplice to murder.
The Ninja Cowl
Level 1 Hat
If there's one thing that the ladies/men love, it's mystery. And
what's more mysterious than covering your entire face with a Ninja
Cowl? "Oh my, I can't see any of that man's face!" they'll exclaim.
"He must have a terrible secret I will uncover with my love."
The Stealth Steeler
Level 39 Hat
Has back-stabbing lost its charm? Is sneaking too simple? Try wearing
this 15 pound metal hat on your head! Enjoy the meta-challenge of
keeping your neck from snapping as you sap sentries! This is
spine-crushing entertainment!
Dr. Whoa #2137
Level 15 Shirt
The Made Man
Level 31
A gentleman always has a flower handy to drop on an opponent's grave.
The Made Man
Level 48
A gentleman always has a flower handy to drop on an opponent's grave.
The Spectre's Spectacles #2610
Level 20 Glasses
So mysterious. So deadly. So nearsighted.
Le Party Phantom
Level 18 Hat
Rogue's Col Roule #3870
Level 15 Apparel
The Business Casual
Level 15 Shirt
It's casual business up front, and more casual business in the back.
Now: check those sides. Yep. It's casual business there too. Cover all
the casual business bases with this unbuttoned suit jacket.
Genuine Sydney Straw Boat
Level 1 Hat
Throw this hat on the ground to express rage, or in the air to express
joy! Take a hat-based trip through time to learn how your great
grandparents displayed emotions in the days before emoticons!
Genuine Vox Diabolus
Level 1 Hat
With this Vox Populi anarchist mask, you can terrify your enemies into
thinking you're the Devil Himself, or worse, a protestor. Either way,
they're probably going to avoid you at the entrance to the supermarket
when you try to get them to sign something.
Genuine Blind Justice
Level 1 Facial Hair
Want to command respect from people standing at an indeterminate
distance from your immediate right? Bolt on a platinum Pinkerton badge
and experience the thrill for yourself!
Genuine Person in the Iron Mask
Level 1 Hat
Turkey? Chicken? Game hens? Your head? This cast iron poultry furnace
will smoke anything placed inside it.
Genuine Pounding Father
Level 1 Hat
Heavy cannot tell lie. Heavy is first President of United States. Of
crushing little baby men.
Genuine Doe-Boy
Level 1 Hat
Protect the important thoughts in your head -- ones like "liberty" and
"freedom" and "democracy" -- with good, honest, hat-shaped American
steel. This helmet won't run (until heated to 2500°F)!
The Festive Ambassador
Level 5 Revolver
Crits on headshot
-15% damage penalty
-20% slower firing speed
The Enforcer
Level 5 Revolver
+20% damage bonus while undisguised
No random critical hits
-20% slower firing speed
The Diamondback
Level 5 Revolver
Gives one guaranteed critical hit for each
building destroyed with your sapper attached
-15% damage penalty
No random critical hits
L'Etranger
Level 5 Revolver
+15 cloak on hit
-20% damage penalty
The Vintage Ambassador
Level 54 Revolver
Crits on headshot
-15% damage penalty
-20% slower firing speed
The Black Rose
Level 1 Knife
Slay it with flowers.
( Not Tradable )
Festive Knife
Level 1 Knife
The Spy-cicle
Level 1 Knife
It's the perfect gift for the man who has everything: an icicle driven
into their back. Even rich people can't buy that in stores.
Silent Killer: No attack noise from backstabs
On Hit by Fire: Become fireproof for 2 seconds
Backstab turns victim to ice
Melts in fire, regenerates after 15 seconds
Genuine Steel Songbird
Level 1
It gets pretty quiet in that sniper's nest. Why not treat yourself to
the haunting rhythmic symphony of bolts being constantly pooped by
this mute, easily terrified incontinent bird?
The Sharp Dresser #5965
Level 1 Knife
Every merc's crazy for a sharp-dressed man. With 15th century
murder-knives extruding from his cufflinks.
Wanga Prick #25923
Level 27 Knife
Upon a successful backstab against a human target, you rapidly disguise as your victim
Silent Killer: No attack noise from backstabs
Wearer cannot disguise
The Big Earner
Level 1 Knife
+30 cloak on kill
-25 max health on wearer
Vintage Conniver's Kunai
Level 1 Kunai
Start off with low health
Kill somebody with this knife
Steal all of their health
On Backstab: Absorbs the health from your victim.
-65 max health on wearer
Your Eternal Reward
Level 1 Knife
Upon a successful backstab against a human target, you rapidly disguise as your victim
Silent Killer: No attack noise from backstabs
Wearer cannot disguise
The Enthusiast's Timepiece
Level 5 Invis Watch
( Not Tradable )
The Vintage Dead Ringer
Level 89 Invis Watch
+80% cloak regen rate
Cloak Type: Feign Death
+60% cloak drain rate
The Vintage Cloak and Dagger
Level 5 Invis Watch
+100% cloak regen rate
Cloak Type: Motion Sensitive
The Red-Tape Recorder
Level 99 Sapper
Reverses enemy building construction
-100% sapper damage penalty
Saxton Hale Mask
Level 10 Hat
Self-Made Mann Co. Supply Crate Key
Level 50 Tool
Used to open locked supply crates.
Effect: Community Sparkle
Unusual Troublemaker's Tossle Cap
Level 90 Hat
Straight outta control point.
Effect: Green Energy
Unusual Backwards Ballcap
Level 10 Hat
Stick it to Major League Baseball by not wearing their hat the right
way.
Effect: Blizzardy Storm
Unusual Whoopee Cap
Level 63 Hat
You'd have to be a jughead not to realize this cap is the pinnacle of
fashion for the discerning youth.
Effect: Purple Confetti
Unusual Dr's Dapper Topper
Level 32 Hat
Effect: Circling Heart
Unusual Triboniophorus Tyrannus
Level 47 Hat
At least he's still telling you to burn things.
Effect: Purple Energy
Unusual Old Guadalajara
Level 32 Hat
This hat adds spice to any occasion.
Effect: Purple Energy
"Evel Knievel"
Level 23 Hat
A sticky-jumper's best friend.
Effect: Nuts n' Bolts
Unusual Big Chief
Level 30 Hat
Effect: Circling Heart
Unusual Large Luchadore
Level 61 Hat
Wrestling's real, and now you can prove it.
Effect: Purple Energy
Unusual Virtual Reality Headset
Level 10 Headset
With these on, you can pretend you're winning.
Effect: Cauldron Bubbles
Unusual Texas Ten Gallon
Level 32 Hat
Though it looks like a simple ten-gallon hat, this modern feat of
engineering actually contains more moving parts than a level 2 Sentry
Gun.
Effect: Purple Energy
Unusual Barnstormer
Level 48 Hat
Step into the headgear and facial hair of America's favorite
aviator/filmmaker/toenail-and-Jarate collector with this hotshot
aviator hat and rakish movie star moustache.
Effect: Orbiting Fire
Unusual Brainiac Hairpiece
Level 8 Facial Hair
Being a maths-enhancing hairpiece that endeavors to heighten the
senses of any soul, be he a gentle-man of leisure deserving of such a
thing, or a loathsome tiller of the earth of whom a beating would not
go unwarranted.
Effect: Bubbling
Unusual Prussian Pickelhaube
Level 17 Hat
A relic from one war brought into another.
Your enemy will get the point.
Effect: Circling TF Logo
Unusual Shooter's Sola Topi
Level 83 Hat
Perfect for exploring the outback and the inside of people's heads.
Effect: Green Energy
"Irish Indulgence"
Level 10 Hat
"Cheers to a hard day, hard work, and hard booze."
Effect: Cauldron Bubbles
Unusual Cosa Nostra Cap
Level 19 Hat
If looks could kill, this dapper fellow would make your head an
accomplice to murder.
Effect: Stormy Storm
"An Actual Festive Tree"
Level 35 Hat
Effect: Blizzardy Storm
Max's Severed Head
Level 9 Hat
Expertly crafted headwear from cruelty-free farms
in the Philippines. Hollowed-out skull casing wicks
moisture away when in the heat of battle.
Earbuds
Level 1 Hat
OSX represent!
"The Ultimate Question"
Level 42 Hat
"Mostly harmless."
Earbuds
Level 100 Hat
OSX represent!
Gentle Manne's Service Medal
Level 100 Medal
Given to those few brave soldiers whom stood guard valiantly without
sleep, nourishment, or a social life.
Medal no. 3281
Gentle Manne's Service Medal
Level 100 Medal
Given to those few brave soldiers whom stood guard valiantly without
sleep, nourishment, or a social life.
Medal no. 5042
The Big Kill
Level 5 Revolver
Combines style with stopping power.
Long exclusive to Freelance Police,
now available for other blood-thirsty mercenaries.
The Vintage Lugermorph
Level 5 Pistol
The ultimate in semi-concealed weaponry.
There's no question you need this gun,
the only question is: where will you keep it?
Vintage Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
Bill's Hat
Level 10 Veteran's Beret
Left 4 You.
"Pixels"
Level 100 Ring
A perpetual bond of commitment between Marshazzle
and Moo I'm A Duck, forever and ever and ever. XoXoX
( Not Tradable, Not Usable in Crafting )
Something Special For Someone Special
Level 100 Ring
A perpetual bond of commitment between tienledinh93
and Marshazzle, forever and ever and ever. XoXoX
( Not Tradable, Not Usable in Crafting )
Something Special For Someone Special
Level 100 Ring
A perpetual bond of commitment between «xPalestinian»ツ™
and Marshazzle, forever and ever and ever. XoXoX
( Not Tradable, Not Usable in Crafting )
"Bling"
Level 100 Ring
A perpetual bond of commitment between {THAT} Flying Bltzsky :D
and Marshazzle, forever and ever and ever. XoXoX
( Not Tradable, Not Usable in Crafting )
Saxton Hale Mask
Level 10 Hat
Cheater's Lament
Level 1 Aura of Incorruptibility
Though some would stop at nothing to achieve hats, you remained
resolute and incorruptible in your quest for head decorations. For
that, you have been rewarded.
Effect: Holy Glow
( Not Tradable )
Mildly Disturbing Halloween Mask
Level 10 Holiday Hat
Brown paper never looked so mildly disturbing.
( Not Tradable )
Ghastlierest Gibus
Level 10 Hat
Way way more ghastly.
This is a special Halloween 2009 item
The Lugermorph
Level 5 Pistol
The ultimate in semi-concealed weaponry.
There's no question you need this gun,
the only question is: where will you keep it?
( Not Tradable )
Ellis' Cap
Level 10 Hat
Alien Swarm Parasite
Level 20 Hat
This cute little guy was once the scourge of humanity in another time
and place. Now he's content to ride on your head and keep the sun off.
Mann Co. Cap
Level 10 Hat
( Not Tradable, Not Usable in Crafting )
Horseless Headless Horsemann's Head
Level 31 Hat
He had one all along...
( Not Tradable )
Horseless Headless Horsemann's Head
Level 31 Hat
He had one all along...
Spine-Chilling Skull
Level 31 Hat
Express your undying hatred for the living.
This is a special Halloween 2010 item
Voodoo Juju
Level 31 Hat
Only the finest leather hats come with tattoos and piercings.
This is a special Halloween 2010 item
Gift from: Sine
( Not Usable in Crafting )
License to Maim
Level 20 Badge
And kill, and break, and smash, and bite. Mainly maim, though.
( Not Tradable )
Hat of Undeniable Wealth And Respect
Level 28 Hat
Earned by completing 28 objectives in 'The Great Steam Treasure Hunt.'
Beware the Cephalopod padlock.
Gift from: Cthulhu
( Not Tradable )
Treasure Hat
Level 15 Hat
Earned by completing 15 objectives in 'The Great Steam Treasure Hunt'
Gift from: Kabuse96
( Not Tradable )
Bounty Hat
Level 30 Hat
Earned by completing 5 objectives in 'The Great Steam Treasure Hunt'
( Not Tradable )
World Traveler's Hat
Level 20 Hat
Given to generous souls who have donated to community map makers. The
effect will only be visible while on a map that has been donated
towards!
Effect: Map Stamps
( Not Tradable, Not Usable in Crafting )
SpaceChem Pin
Level 20 Badge
<no employment record found>
Crafted by Marshazzle
Frontline Field Recorder
Level 20 Hat
I'm the writer, the director, and the star.
( Not Tradable )
The Spiral Sallet
Level 10 Hat
Little known fact: knights in chess travel over other pieces by rocket
jumping.
( Not Tradable )
Professor Speks
Level 5 Hat
Give your teacher the gift of insight, paper clip and rubber band
included.
( Not Tradable )
The Proof of Purchase
Level 50 Hat
From another era.
( Not Tradable )
Summer Shades
Level 10 Glasses
These are famous.
( Not Tradable )
Summer Shades
Level 10 Glasses
These are famous.
Gift from: Cthulhu
( Not Tradable )
Party Hat
Level 10 Hat
( Not Tradable )
Noise Maker - TF Birthday
Level 5 Party Favor
Unlimited use
( Not Tradable )
The Manniversary Paper Hat
Level 10 Hat
The Seal Mask
Level 31 Mask
Turn routine melee attacks into environmental hate crimes with this
adorable mask.
( Not Tradable )
The MONOCULUS!
Level 31 Hat
Celebrate the Demo's most serious childhood injury with this gruesome
mask based on his missing, haunted eye.
( Not Tradable )
The Bombinomicon
Level 20 Badge
'If ye gaze upon one tome-themed badge this year, MAKE IT NOT THIS
ONE!' - Merasmus the Magician'
Explode spectacularly on death
( Not Tradable )
The Spine-Chilling Skull 2011
Level 31 Hat
Re-express your undying hatred for the living annually with this
skull-themed hate hat.
This is a special Halloween 2011 item
Noise Maker - Winter Holiday
Level 5 Party Favor
Unlimited use
The Full Head Of Steam
Level 29 Hat
You never took a break from cp_foundry, and now you can prove it with
the actual steam whistle used to call the breaks you never took!
( Not Tradable )
The Bolt Action Blitzer
Level 10 Hat
Take a knee, boys. Now, any helmet will protect your head when you're
wearing it – but what about when you're NOT? The Bolt Action Blitzer
solves that problem by securing it to your skull with three
one-and-a-quarter-inch coarse-thread galvanized crown bolts. Make sure
it's in your favorite color, 'cause you WILL be buried in it.
( Not Tradable )
The Gentle Munitionne of Leisure
Level 19 Hat
This snappy all-class stovepipe commemorates man and monkey's joint
attempt to conquer the heavens with a built-in rocket that, every year
on the anniversary of the launch, might violently explode.
Effect: Genteel Smoke
( Not Tradable )
Pyrovision Goggles
Level 85 Pyrovision Goggles
Enter a world of imagination that's far superior to the crap-ass
worlds of imagination you get from books. Pyrovision lets you see the
TF2niverse from our favorite arsonist's perspective.
vision opt in flags (1)
On Equip: Visit Pyroland
( Not Tradable )
Power Up Canteen
Level 20 Usable Item
Applies a bonus effect for a limited amount of time when used. Must
first be filled at an Upgrade Station and can only be filled with one
bonus type at a time.
Currently holds 0 charges
Holds a maximum of 3 charges
Each charge lasts 5 seconds
( Not Tradable )
Operation Steel Trap Badge
Level 1 Badge
Your Mann Up progress through Operation Steel Trap is saved on this
badge.
( Not Tradable )
Operation Mecha Engine Badge
Level 2 Badge
Your Mann Up progress through Operation Mecha Engine is saved on this
badge.
( Not Tradable )
The Skull Island Topper
Level 31 Hat
This terrifying (innocuous) witching cap was found by the all-powerful
(mediocre) wizard Merasmus in the depths of the Hades Spiral (right
near the entrance of the Hades Spiral).
Killed Merasmus at level 18
( Not Tradable )
The Saxxy Clapper Badge
Level 100 Badge
Harness the seductive black magic of Hollywood with this commemorative
clapper board—the same used by actual movie directors. Now YOU can
tell Ryan Reynolds what to do!
( Not Tradable )
Taunt: The Director's Vision
Level 5 Special Taunt
Equip this item in your Action Slot and press the Action button to
tell your victims you are making a Replay of their pathetic demise to
share with everyone.
( Not Tradable )
Taunt: The Meet the Medic
Level 5 Special Taunt
Remind those ungrateful bastards how valuable your Medic skills are by
striking a heroic pose accompanied by an angelic choir, beams of
divine light, and a flock of doves.
Taunt: The Meet the Medic
Level 5 Special Taunt
Remind those ungrateful bastards how valuable your Medic skills are by
striking a heroic pose accompanied by an angelic choir, beams of
divine light, and a flock of doves.
Taunt: The Schadenfreude
Level 5 Special Taunt
Share a good natured laugh with everyone except that one guy you just
shot.
Taunt: The High Five!
Level 5 Special Taunt
Don't leave your friends hanging.
This is a press-and-hold taunt. Hold down the action slot key to
remain in the taunt's pose.
The First-Class Philanthropist's Spirit Of Giving
The First-Class Philanthropist's%s6 Badge - Gifts Given%s5: 157
The more gifts you give away, the bigger your heart will get! Get what
gift-givers call "the Smissmas spirit," and what cardiologists call
hypertrophic cardiomyopathy.
( Not Tradable )
Soldier of Fortune
Level 10 Badge
Sure, some may have been doing it longer. But you've proven few can do
it better.
Hire Date: February 18, 2008 (14:04:48 GMT)
( Not Tradable )
Bronze Dueling Badge
Level 2 Badge
This badge tracks your duel statistics.
Increase its level by winning duels!
( Not Tradable )
Saxton Hale Mask
Level 10 Hat
Vintage Modest Pile of Hat
Level 53 Hat
Because a Gentleman is not one without one.
Vintage Noble Amassment of Hats
Level 97 Hat
For the Gentleman who believes even his hat deserves a hat.
Vintage Towering Pillar of Hats
Level 18 Hat
A-ha-ha! You are as PRESUMPTUOUS as you are POOR and IRISH. Tarnish
notte the majesty of my TOWER of HATS.
Horrific Headsplitter
Level 31 Hat
When wearing such a piece of headgear it is best to keep an open mind.
A Rather Festive Tree
Level 81 Hat
The Athletic Supporter
Level 10 Hat
[Insert Favorite Regional Team Here]
Resurrection Associate Pin
Level 13 Badge
Summer Hat
Level 10 Hat
E hele mākou i kahakai.
( Not Usable in Crafting )
Lucky No. 42
Level 10 Beach Towel
Why fight in the sun when you could lounge in the shade?
( Not Usable in Crafting )
Flip-Flops
Level 10 Flip-Flops
Only for those with manly adductor halluci.
( Not Usable in Crafting )
Noise Maker - Fireworks
Level 5 Party Favor
The Merc's Pride Scarf
Level 10 Scarf
Wear your loyalty like a brightly-colored noose around your neck.
( Not Usable in Crafting )
The Team Captain #6048
Level 25 Hat
Our lawyers say 'YES! YES!'
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Brown Bomber #788
Level 86 Hat
Celebrate Canada's birthday, on whatever day that happens, with this
commemorative Canadian Prime Minister's ceremonial dress hat.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Brown Bomber #1572
Level 11 Hat
Celebrate Canada's birthday, on whatever day that happens, with this
commemorative Canadian Prime Minister's ceremonial dress hat.
Crafted by Marshazzle
The Holiday Headcase
Level 100 Hat
Merry Smissmas, everyone! May all your miscellaneous holidays be happy
(or somber, depending on your cultural traditions) with this
ultra-rare TF item, donated by Steam User BANG!
The B.M.O.C.
Level 30 Hat
Be the Big Man of Christmas with this fur-fringed pom-pom hat!
The Ebenezer
Level 30 Hat
If you are visited by one piece of spectral headwear this night, make
it the Ghost of Christmas Hats, donated in true Smissmas spirit by
Steam User Jacen.
The Teufort Tooth Kicker
Level 10 Boots
These steel-toed dogs were scientifically engineered (in a wind
tunnel) by America's foremost authorities on mouth-kicking to
perfectly fit the inside of an idiot's mouth.
The Teufort Tooth Kicker
Level 10 Boots
These steel-toed dogs were scientifically engineered (in a wind
tunnel) by America's foremost authorities on mouth-kicking to
perfectly fit the inside of an idiot's mouth.
Dr. Grordbort's Crest
Level 15 Badge
A symbol of service in the Venusian legions.
Dr. Grordbort's Silver Crest
Level 15 Badge
Being a highly malleable, thoroughly combustible silver crest that
declares one's commitment, and intention, to immolate all creatures on
God's Earth.
( Not Usable in Crafting )
Dr. Grordbort's Copper Crest
Level 15 Badge
Being a water-soluble, highly poisonous copper crest offering mute
testament to one's commitment to the sciences. Prolonged exposure may
cause tissue putridity, muscle atrophy and bone softening in the
infirm, elderly and those graced with child.
( Not Usable in Crafting )
Vintage Pyrovision Goggles
Level 88 Pyrovision Goggles
Enter a world of imagination that's far superior to the crap-ass
worlds of imagination you get from books. Pyrovision lets you see the
TF2niverse from our favorite arsonist's perspective.
vision opt in flags (1)
On Equip: Visit Pyroland
Witnessed the 2012 inferno
The Balloonicorn
Level 20 Balloon
Oh my goodness! Is it Balloonicorn? The Mayor of Pyroland? Don't be
ridiculous, we're talking about an inflatable unicorn. He's the
Municipal Ombudsman. Between you and me, Balloonicorn's a joke down at
City Hall. Gary Brottman, the inflatable Sewer Superintendent, is
sleeping with Balloonicorn's wife. Anyway, when he's riding around on
your shoulder don't mention ANY of this to him, because Balloonicorn
is on a hair trigger and he's usually pretty drunk.
vision opt in flags (1)
On Equip: Visit Pyroland
Only visible in Pyroland
The Tuxxy
Level 47 Tuxedo
The carpets will run red with enemy blood thanks to this dapper Second
Annual Saxxy Awards ensemble.
The Frying Pan
Level 5 Frying Pan
The Conscientious Objector
Level 25 Sign
We gave peace a chance. It didn't work.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
"Plausible Panther"
Level 25 Sign
We gave peace a chance. It didn't work.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
The Conscientious Objector
Level 25 Sign
We gave peace a chance. It didn't work.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
The Conscientious Objector
Level 25 Sign
We gave peace a chance. It didn't work.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
Clan Pride #3732
Level 20 Medallion
Because it's cheaper and less painful than a tattoo.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
Clan Pride #3589
Level 20 Medallion
Because it's cheaper and less painful than a tattoo.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
Clan Pride #4593
Level 20 Medallion
Because it's cheaper and less painful than a tattoo.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
Photo Badge #2396
Level 20 Badge
Discourage identity theft.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
Photo Badge #3976
Level 20 Badge
Discourage identity theft.
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
Flair! #1913
Level 20 Flair!
Show enthusiasm! For your favorite things!
Custom decals can be applied to this item.
Barely-Melted Capacitor
Level 1 Ash
This damaged capacitor seems to be fire-proof as well as broken. Is
there anything it CAN'T do (besides work)?
Gift from: Ace Allen
Barely-Melted Capacitor
Level 1 Ash
This damaged capacitor seems to be fire-proof as well as broken. Is
there anything it CAN'T do (besides work)?
Smissmas Wreath
Level 1 Pin
Nothing says "Happy Holidays" quite like prickly leaves and poisonous
berries pinned to your chest.
Antlers #321
Level 14 Hat
Give your opponents the gift of hesitation this holiday season when
they pause to think, "Is that a cute little deer, or-" KA-BLAM! Dead.
Manniversary Package
Level 1 Package
From your fine friends at Mann Co., celebrating our one-year
anniversary.
This contains a free sample from our fall lineup and can be opened
from your backpack.
Secret Saxton
Level 1 Gift
When used, this Action Item gives a random gift
to a random person on the server!
Gift from: What The Pony >.>
Pile o' Gifts
Level 23 Gift
When used, this Action Item gives a random gift
to up to 23 other people on the server!
( Not Usable in Crafting )
Mann Co. Store Package
Level 1 Package
This bag contains one free item from the Mann Co. store! You can open
it from your backpack!
Salvaged Mann Co. Supply Crate
Level 10
You need a Mann Co. Supply Crate Key to open this.
You can pick one up at the Mann Co. Store.
Crate Series #30
Backpack Expander
Level 52 Tool
Add 100 extra slots to your backpack!
(2000 spaces maximum)
Genuine Sun-on-a-Stick
Level 10 RIFT Fire Mace
Spiky end goes into other man.
100% critical hit vs burning players
-25% damage penalty
Genuine Sharpened Volcano Fragment
Level 10 RIFT Fire Axe
Improves upon Mother Nature's original
design for volcanos by increasing portability.
Modern science is unable to explain exactly
where the lava is coming from.
On Hit: target is engulfed in flames
-20% damage penalty
Genuine Hero's Hachimaki
Level 1 Hat
Genuine Dread Knot
Level 1 Hat
Crybabies cower
At the approach of fat man
With terrible hair
Genuine Samur-Eye
Level 1 Hat
One-eyed Scottish drunk
Dons his helmet for battle
Blacks out, misses war
Genuine Geisha Boy
Level 1 Hat
Frog leaps into pond
Lotus blossoms fall to earth
Medic has girl's hair
Genuine Noh Mercy
Level 1 Hat
Chain-smoking Frenchman
Skulks in shadows, then attacks
Terrifying mask
Genuine Fan O'War
Level 5 Gunbai
Winds of Gravel Pit
Scout brings on his fan!
You are marked for death
On Hit: One target at a time is marked for death, causing all damage taken to be mini-crits
-90% damage penalty
Genuine Half-Zatoichi
Level 5 Katana
Soldiers and Demos
Can duel with katanas
For a one-hit kill
On Kill: Restores you to 100% health
Honorbound: Once drawn cannot be sheathed until it kills.
Genuine Concheror
Level 5 Sashimono
With buff, some damage
Dished out by nearby teammates
Comes back as healing
Genuine Conniver's Kunai
Level 1 Kunai
Start off with low health
Kill somebody with this knife
Steal all of their health
On Backstab: Absorbs the health from your victim.
-65 max health on wearer
Genuine Noise Maker - Koto
Level 5 Party Favor
Genuine Aperture Labs Hard Hat
Level 10 Hat
Produce-powered personal illumination and cranial safety apparatus.
NOT FOR USE OUTSIDE OFFICIAL APERTURE FACILITIES.
Genuine Companion Cube Pin
Level 20 Badge
Genuine Hetman's Headpiece
Level 1 Hat
Cossacks and war go together like gołąbki and wódka.
Genuine Janissary Ketche
Level 1 Hat
The first standing army to wear uniforms wanted to make damn sure
everyone else knew it.
Genuine Brain Bucket
Level 1 Hat
Zombie tested, braaaains approved.
Genuine Dead Cone
Level 1 Hat
You'll stop them dead wearing this stylish traffic cone.
Genuine Sign of the Wolf's School
Level 20 Medallion
One wolf, no moon. Collect all three!
Genuine Three-Rune Blade
Level 10 Sword
On Hit: Bleed for 5 seconds
On Miss: Hit yourself. Idiot.
Genuine Conjurer's Cowl
Level 1 Hat
I put on my wizard's hat.
Genuine Maul
Level 5 Sledgehammer
Packs a devastating punch with a hint of Mars dust.
100% damage vs buildings
Damage removes Sappers
-25% damage vs players
Genuine Planeswalker Goggles
Level 1 Hat
No more bugs in your eyes as you blaze across the map.
Genuine Planeswalker Helm
Level 1 Hat
If anyone asks, tell them the tusks qualify you for veterinary work.
Genuine Righteous Bison
Level 30 Indivisible Particle Smasher
Does not require ammo
Projectile penetrates enemy targets
Projectile cannot be deflected
Deals only 20% damage to buildings
Genuine Mask of the Shaman
Level 10 Mask
An invincibility mask made by the Ancients. It hasn't worked in a
long, long time.
Genuine Stahlhelm
Level 10 Hat
Genuine Pilotka
Level 10 Hat
Genuine Dragonborn Helmet
Level 10 Hat
Designed to inspire fear, the dragons this helm was based on were less
than impressed.
Genuine Anger
Level 10 Hat
Genuine Pip-Boy
Level 10 Armband
Using modern super-deluxe resolution graphics!
Genuine Wingstick
Level 10
Genuine Original
Level 5 Rocket Launcher
Genuine Nanobalaclava
Level 10 Hat
Genuine Company Man
Level 10 Hat
Genuine Purity Fist
Level 10
Genuine Deus Specs
Level 10 Glasses
Genuine Widowmaker
Level 5 Shotgun
No reload necessary
On Hit: damage dealt is returned as ammo
Per Shot: -30 ammo
Uses metal for ammo
Genuine Short Circuit
Level 5 Robot Arm
On Fire: Generates an electrical field that destroys
projectiles and does slight damage to players
No reload necessary
Per Shot: -35 ammo
Uses metal for ammo
No random critical hits
Genuine Machina
Level 5 Sniper Rifle
On Full Charge: Projectiles penetrate players
On Full Charge: +15% damage per shot
Cannot fire unless zoomed
Fires tracer rounds
Genuine Diamondback
Level 5 Revolver
Gives one guaranteed critical hit for each
building destroyed with your sapper attached
-15% damage penalty
No random critical hits
Genuine Killer Exclusive
Level 10 Hat
Break news, spirits and heads.
Genuine Ball-Kicking Boots
Level 10 Shoes
Show balls who is the boss.
Genuine Noise Maker - Vuvuzela
Level 5 Party Favor
Genuine Cold War Luchador
Level 10 Hat
The most terrifying Soviet/Latino partnership since the Cuban Missile
Crisis.
Genuine Mark of the Saint
Level 20 Badge
Genuine Apoco-Fists
Level 10 Fists
Turn every one of your fingers into the Four Horsemen of the
Apocalypse! That's over nineteen Horsemen of the Apocalypse per glove!
The most Apocalypse we've ever dared attach to one hand!
Killing an enemy with a critical hit will dismember your victim. Painfully.
Genuine War Head
Level 10 Hat
Protect your thought-horde from dragons, sorcery, and other
make-believe dangers with this spiky lead battle-mask.
Genuine Point and Shoot
Level 10 Hat
The next time someone accuses you of not being a real wizard because
you refuse to (read: can't) do spells, poke them in the eye with this
magically blinding pointy hat and run.
Genuine Dashin' Hashshashin
Level 10 Hat
When you need to go deep undercover, one disguise is not enough! Put a
hood over that ski-mask, then wrap a towel around it. Boldly announce
to the world that you are inconspicuous!
Genuine Sharp Dresser
Level 1 Knife
Every merc's crazy for a sharp-dressed man. With 15th century
murder-knives extruding from his cufflinks.
Genuine Bolgan
Level 1 Hat
Protect the all-important empty socket part of your face while giving
enemies an irresistible target: unimportant exposed parts like your
mouth, nose and generally all the non-socket parts of your face.
Genuine Warsworn Helmet
Level 1 Hat
Whether you're a mercenary in the granaries and gravel pits of the
Badlands or an immense fantasy world, this helmet tells potential
employers everything they need to know: You will do horrible, horrible
things for money.
Genuine Bolgan Family Crest
Level 1 Badge
This stylish bronze badge lets people know that at some crucial point
in your family genealogy, one of your family members became intimately
involved with a monster cyclops.
Genuine Battle Bob
Level 1 Hat
Simple and elegant, this slimming hair helmet will bring out the
natural contours of your fearsome war face.
Genuine Bushman's Boonie
Level 1 Hat
Everybody knows that the head part of your body needs twice as much
camouflage as all the other parts. Ask anyone in the army and they'll
kill you and hide the body, because that widely-known information is
CLASSIFIED.
Genuine Merc Medal
Level 20 Badge
There exists an agency so secret that only three people on the planet
even know of its existence. This is the medal they give each other
when one of them does a great job.
Genuine Scrap Pack
Level 1 Robot
Why let your front have all the fun? Add more junk to the upper part
of your trunk with this selection from the finest junkyards in Paris.
Genuine Cross-Comm Express
Level 1 Hat
This full spectrum battle monocle receives signals from a satellite at
light speed, which means you may have to slow down a little so they
can catch up to you.
Genuine Cross-Comm Crash Helmet
Level 1 Hat
This purely cosmetic battlefield awareness accessory will fool
everyone from the lowliest private to the mayor of the army into
thinking you're probably in the army too.
Genuine Doublecross-Comm
Level 1 Hat
This battlefield awareness bandanna is stitched with nanofibers that
can download battlefields from Wikipedia straight to your face, so you
will never not be aware of them.
Genuine Quadwrangler
Level 1 Science Project
This quantum-collared lab coat includes a handy rubber pipe that
siphons blood from your heart, where it is not needed, to your
shooting arm, where it is!
Genuine Professor's Pineapple
Level 1 Science Project
We don't know what's in it, but we found it in some rusty drums buried
in a shallow grave in a forest, so let's face it, you'll probably get
super powers if you drink it.
Genuine Atomic Accolade
Level 1 Badge
Skip past all the boring busywork of science and get right to the
exciting part: the fabulous prizes! This prestigious ribbon certifies
your bravery in the field of excellence.
Genuine Robot Chicken Hat
Level 10 Hat
Why did the chicken REALLY cross the road? To get hit by a car, stolen
by a mad scientist, and transformed into a terrifying cyborg that you
can wear on your head. So the next time you hear someone telling you
that joke, set that smug joke-teller straight, because you've got the
FACTS.
Genuine Balloonicorn
Level 20 Balloon
Oh my goodness! Is it Balloonicorn? The Mayor of Pyroland? Don't be
ridiculous, we're talking about an inflatable unicorn. He's the
Municipal Ombudsman. Between you and me, Balloonicorn's a joke down at
City Hall. Gary Brottman, the inflatable Sewer Superintendent, is
sleeping with Balloonicorn's wife. Anyway, when he's riding around on
your shoulder don't mention ANY of this to him, because Balloonicorn
is on a hair trigger and he's usually pretty drunk.
vision opt in flags (1)
On Equip: Visit Pyroland
Only visible in Pyroland
Genuine Human Cannonball
Level 1 Hat
Ask any daredevil what they strap onto their heads before getting shot
out of a cannon and the answer will be the same: a glassy, unfocused
stare from years of head trauma. Head trauma that could have been
prevented with this sharp-looking crash helmet.
Genuine Marxman
Level 1 Glasses
Everyone knows laughter is the best medicine. But did you know that
laughter is also the best disguise? No? Well, good thing you're not a
cop infiltrating the Chinese mafia, then. Oh wait you are. AND NOW
YOU'RE DEAD. Look, rookie, these glasses are hilarious.
Genuine Triad Trinket
Level 1 Necklace
Clothes make the man, and jewelry makes the man look ridiculous if not
worn correctly. This understated gold chain strikes a perfect balance
that says, "Yes, I'm wearing a necklace, but I left the tiara at
home."
Genuine Champ Stamp
Level 1 Tattoos
Show Chinese organized crime gangs who's boss by wearing their cool
tattoos without actually participating in any of their totally illegal
criminal conspiracies! Note: DO NOT actually show your new tattoo to
ANYONE in a Chinese organized crime gang.
Genuine Flying Guillotine
Level 1 Cleaver
Throw at your enemies to make them bleed!
Long distance hits cause mini-crits
100% critical hit vs stunned players
No random critical hits
Genuine Neon Annihilator
Level 1 Sign
100% critical hit vs wet players
Damage removes Sappers
-20% damage vs players
No random critical hits
Genuine Huo-Long Heater
Level 1 Minigun
Sustains a ring of flames while deployed
6 ammo consumed per second while deployed
Genuine Red-Tape Recorder
Level 1 Sapper
Reverses enemy building construction
-100% sapper damage penalty
Genuine Lone Star
Level 1 Hat
You're runnin' the show in these here parts; you deserve a big hat
with a star. The size of the hat is indicative of how much of the show
you're running – which is all of it, by the way. Honestly, we really
don't know how people get respect without this hat.
Genuine Russian Rocketeer
Level 1 Backpack
The latest in space-primate propulsion, this jet pack has been tested
exclusively by apes! We can't stress enough how few human flight tests
we've conducted with this product!
Genuine Awesomenauts Badge
Level 1 Badge
This badge is a sign of acknowledgment from another mercenary group.
Just acknowledgment, all right? It's not like they like you or
anything. It's not like they wish you'd maybe follow up on that Merc
Party Invite they sent you a couple weeks ago. They're stone cold
killers, you understand? Also there will be spinach dip at the party.
Genuine AWPer Hand
Level 1 Sniper Rifle
This controversial bolt-action beaut is banned in thousands of
countries, and with good reason: You could really hurt someone with
this thing.
Genuine Archimedes
Level 64
Before Archimedes came into the Medic's care, he made his living
through wedding dovery. A lucrative trade, but he always felt
something was missing. He looks back on the day that the Medic stole
that catering van during the prime minister's wedding as the best day
of his life. He's been burrowing into the chests of unwitting patients
ever since.
Genuine Crafty Hair
Level 1 Hair
If you're ever planning on fighting aliens, this is the hair to have.
Aliens are afraid of angular, painstakingly coiffed hair, so the mere
sight of you will send them running back to Mars. Or, alternatively,
we're completely wrong and you're going to die. Either way, though,
you're going to look stylin'.
Genuine Area 451
Level 1 Hat
If aliens ever invaded Badlands and used their special alien powers to
make all of our heads look like alien heads, this is a scientifically
accurate representation of what Pyro would look like. We tried doing
similar mock-ups with the rest of the TF team, but we finished one of
Heavy and haven't stopped crying and vomiting long enough to do the
other ones.
Genuine Vigilant Pin